Thursday, January 29, 2009

The Sexiest Man on Earth

An Homage to Adam Rubin


A/S/L
Age: 22
Sex: Male
Location: Princeton, NJ

Corporeal Dimensions
Height: 5'6.5"
Width: 1'2"
Depth: 8km
Mass: 9.3 stone
Muscle tone: Beach Bod
Physique: Strapping Lad

Pigmentation
Skin: Mayonaise
Hair: Ribbed Chenille Blonde
Eyes: Lapis Lazuli
Areola: Soft Doe Brown
Perineum: Aqua Velva
Pubis: Mahogany















Personality

Zodiac: Scorpio
Birthstone: Topaz
Major Traits: Charming, Debonair, Compassionate, and Uppity
Minor Traits: Cuddly, Emotilogical, Loyal, Teamwork
Defining Moment Since Birth: The first time he made love to his wife in Harvest Moon.
Pet Peeves: SUVs, Final Fantasy, and manginess.

Hobbies
1. Running
2. Gym
3. Watching Sports
4. Roller Hockey
5. Basketball
6. Trainspotting

Faves
Favorite Food: Parmesan Crusted Tenderloin
Favorite Color: Asian Orange Blue
Favorite Film: The Shawshank Redemption
Favorite Board Game: Dirty Minds
Favorite Animal: Chipmunk
Favorite Super Smash Brothers Level: Kirby's Dream Land
Favorite Bedtime Story: Spider-man

2 comments:

  1. adam is 22...and i think he likes RPGs. Also is being cuddly and refusing to cuddle or be touched mutually exclusive? This is brilliant. Adam if you're reading this hit me up!

    ReplyDelete
  2. ps-if adam's skin is mayonnaise i want to put it on my love sandwich

    ReplyDelete